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:iconsomethingoncesacred: More from SomethingOnceSacred


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Great Literature by ArthurCrow

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Submitted on
November 17, 2012
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The narrow spaces
Between typewritten letters
Are just large enough
To lay in.

You and I
Are crafters of flesh and bone;
Our skins,
Made of weathered canvas
And stitched together with
Sweet dreams on lonely nights.

Blood falls from your lips,
Staining those folded
Paper butterflies
You make so well;

I like to catch them
When they fall,

And toss them back into the air.

There are
Tiny,
Crimson-colored pieces of you
Splattered about the walls
And the inside
Of my mouth.

(You taste of melancholy,
And masked, uneasy lullabies.)

I would happily
Bear the red smears
Of your steady fingertips
If you run out of
Tattered parchment.

Allow me to
Spread my ashes
Over your ribs and
In the hollow of your throat;

You would look beautiful
Covered in faerie-tales
Made of soot.

I will sing to you as we write
A few more,
Peaceful endings
Across our
Broken bodies-

Beds of coal,
Disguised in silks,
Promise dirty wordsmiths breath
In the wake of
Sleepless morns
And restless eves.

I can see myself
Blowing melodious smoke
Under your tongue
As you
Fill my lungs
With plasma.

Perhaps now,
We can both
Go to sleep.
You are my favorite thing

To dream;

You are my favorite

Story to write.


--

I had a dream of using the ashes of my past to write lovely words over your waiting skin, and you using your spilled blood to mark my flesh with happier endings.

There was never a time before then that I slept so sweetly.

--

-Is there a particular part of this piece that you liked best? Least?

-How effective is the imagery?

-Is the wording too odd?









*SomethingOnceSacred
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:iconforestmeetwildfire:
forestmeetwildfire Featured By Owner Feb 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Your fantastic work has been featured here!
I'd really appreciate it if you could give some love to the other features and :+fav: the journal! :heart:
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:iconsomethingoncesacred:
SomethingOnceSacred Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh, my goodness, thank you! Hahah, I'm really honored, and I shall absolutely be sure to go and give the rest of the features a look. ^^
Reply
:iconforestmeetwildfire:
forestmeetwildfire Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
My pleasure :aww:
Thanks for taking a look!
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:iconpigeonguy:
PigeonGuy Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2012  Professional Writer
Oh this is soft, deep, and amazing.
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:iconsomethingoncesacred:
SomethingOnceSacred Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Hahah, thank you, dear. I'm glad you enjoyed it. ^^
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:iconpigeonguy:
PigeonGuy Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2012  Professional Writer
indeed!
Reply
:iconskrayle:
Skrayle Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Student General Artist
Absolutely fantastic. Like the others have said, you have a fantastic way of describing things that is both vivid and slightly surreal. I don't think the wording is odd, just unique. In a good way. And I love the first stanza, it's such great imagery, you're drawn in right away.
Reply
:iconsomethingoncesacred:
SomethingOnceSacred Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Oh, my gosh ;;

Thank you very much for your lovely comment, first of all! You've really made my day, dear. ^^

And second, I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts and answering my question. So thank you very much for that as well! :huggle: I'm so glad you enjoyed it. ^^
Reply
:iconskrayle:
Skrayle Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2012  Student General Artist
You're very welcome! :D
Reply
:iconthemoormaiden:
TheMoorMaiden Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Student Writer
I think this is beautiful. :heart: I love the lines:

You would look beautiful
Covered in faerie-tales
Made of soot.


There's some really beautiful imagery throughout, and you should be really proud of it. :D I agree with ~schongslipper that a little re-organization will benefit the piece, but that's something which can be easily fixed. :nod:

Lovely work, keep writing!
Reply
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